As I reflect on my own life and relationships and how they’ve shaped who I am. Understanding attachment has made me more aware of why I connect with certain people and things in the way I do and how those early bonds in life can set the tone for relationships. I see now that attachment is more than just about feeling close to someone; it’s about feeling secure, understood, and safe. And playing safe is how I’ve been playing in the last few years since my corporate job.

As I’ve explored the different attachment styles—secure, anxious, avoidant, and disorganized—I’ve been able to see myself in parts of each. There are times when I feel secure and trust others easily, but I also recognize moments when I feel anxious and need reassurance. Understanding this has been eye-opening, and it’s helped me approach relationships with more self-compassion. Instead of feeling like my attachment style defines me, I’m learning that it’s a place for personal growth.

Reflecting on my attachment experiences has also given me insight into my relationships with family and friends and what I choose to hang onto as mementos. I’ve come to understand why certain dynamics felt difficult and why some connections have not lasted. For instance, I realize that some of my tendencies to withdraw during conflict stem from an avoidant attachment style, while my desire for close, meaningful connections aligns with a more secure attachment base.

Learning about attachment styles brings awareness to my way of being. Instead of feeling bound by patterns, I see opportunities to grow and cultivate healthier relationships. Attachment styles are adaptable and allow me to work towards feeling secure in my relationships with myself and others. The journey isn’t always easy, but it’s empowering to recognize the patterns and know I have the choice to change. Embracing this understanding has deepened my relationship with myself.